Lying always feels simple in the moment. You’re caught, you’re scared, you’re embarrassed, and your brain throws out the quickest escape route: “Just say this. It’ll make the problem go away.”
But it never really goes away, does it?
Once you tell a lie, you don’t just change the story—you start a second life you have to constantly manage. You now have:
- What actually happened
- What you said happened
- And the pressure of keeping those two stories from bumping into each other
That’s exhausting.
Lies Come With a Monthly Payment
Lies are like taking out a loan with crazy interest. You get quick relief up front—no consequences right now, no uncomfortable conversation right now. But then:
- You have to remember what you said
- You have to repeat it the same way to different people
- You have to cover it with more lies when things don’t line up
Every time you run into that person again or that situation comes back around, your heart rate goes up:
“Wait, what did I tell them?”
“Who else did I say that to?”
“Do they know I’m lying?”
That’s not freedom. That’s anxiety.
And if you’re already dealing with mental health struggles, addiction, or stress, adding a stack of lies on top is like throwing extra weight on a body that’s already tired.
The Truth Hurts Once. A Lie Hurts Over and Over.
Telling the truth can sting. It can lead to tough conversations, disappointment, arguments, or consequences.
But here’s the thing:
- The truth usually hurts once
- A lie comes back and hurts you every time it’s remembered, questioned, or exposed
When you tell the truth:
- You might feel shame, guilt, or fear for a moment
- But after that, healing can actually begin
- Trust has a chance to grow
- You can relax, because you don’t have to remember or perform anything
When you lie:
- You carry that weight everywhere
- You’re always “on guard”
- You never really feel safe, because you know the foundation is fake
Truth gives you a solid floor. Lies feel like walking on a rotted board that could snap at any second.
Lying in Survival Mode
A lot of us learned how to lie young. Sometimes it wasn’t even about being “bad”—it was survival:
- Lying to avoid getting hit, yelled at, or punished
- Lying to protect someone else
- Lying to hide addiction, depression, or pain
After a while, lying becomes automatic. You don’t even pause—you just react.
But as adults, especially in recovery and healing, we hit a point where we have to ask:
“Is this still protecting me, or is it hurting my life now?”
Most of the time, the lies that once felt like protection are now the very things blocking us from real peace.
The Emotional Cost of Lying
Lying doesn’t just mess up relationships; it messes up you:
- Anxiety: Constant fear of being found out
- Guilt and shame: Feeling like a “bad person,” not just a person who made mistakes
- Paranoia: Overthinking how people see you, assuming everyone is suspicious
- Exhaustion: Mentally drained from keeping stories straight
And here’s a tough truth: Every time you lie, you also tell yourself, “The real me is not enough. The truth isn’t acceptable.”
That chips away at your self-worth.
Telling the Truth Builds Real Freedom
Honesty doesn’t mean you’re perfect. It means you stop pretending to be.
When you start telling the truth—especially when it’s uncomfortable—little by little you start to feel:
- Lighter
- Cleaner inside
- More confident
- More grounded
Because now:
- If someone asks you a question, you don’t have to panic
- If your past comes up, you don’t have to scramble
- If your name is in someone’s mouth, you don’t have to worry about which version of you they met
You are who you say you are. That’s freedom.
Honesty and Recovery
For anyone in recovery from addiction or working on their mental health, truth-telling is a game changer.
Lies keep you sick. Lies protect your addiction, your ego, and your shame.
Truth, on the other hand, opens doors:
- To real help from therapists, sponsors, and friends
- To real accountability
- To real connection with people who actually know what’s going on with you
You can’t heal what you keep hiding.
How to Start Choosing Truth (Even If You’re Scared)
If lying has been your default for a long time, flipping that switch isn’t easy. But you can start small:
- Pause Before You Answer
When you’re about to respond, take a breath. Ask yourself, “What’s the honest answer?” Just that pause can change everything. - Tell the Truth in Safe Places First
Open up to a therapist, support group, or a trusted friend. Practice saying the real thing, even if your voice shakes. - Admit When You’ve Lied
This is hard, but powerful:
“Hey, I wasn’t honest about that earlier. Here’s the truth.”
People might be surprised, but many will actually respect your courage. - Accept That Truth Might Have Consequences
Honesty doesn’t magically erase all problems. Sometimes it brings consequences. But those consequences are real, and you can work through real life a lot better than a fake one. - Remind Yourself: You’re Worth Being Known
You don’t have to perform or pretend. The real you—flaws, scars, past mistakes and all—is still worthy of love, respect, and growth.
The Simple Life: One Story, One You
In the end, telling the truth is easier because there’s only one version of reality you have to live in.
- One story
- One memory
- One version of you that shows up wherever you go
No more juggling lies. No more fixing one lie with three more. No more feeling like you’re always one slip-up away from being exposed.
Telling the truth might be scary in the moment, but long-term? It’s calmer. It’s cleaner. It’s lighter.
And you deserve that kind of peace.
— Josh Bridges
YOU {R} NOT ALONE YOU HAVE A VOICE! 