When we’re kids, “Honor your father and your mother” sounds pretty simple: listen, don’t talk back, clean your room (at least when they’re watching). But when we grow up, life gets more complicated. We get our own opinions, our own beliefs, our own ways of doing things. Sometimes we look at our parents and think, I love you… but I don’t agree with you at all.
So what does honoring them look like then?
For me, honoring my mom and my stepfather isn’t about pretending we always see eye to eye. We don’t. I’m an adult now with my own life, my own recovery, my own walk with God. There are moments where I have to make choices they might not fully understand, and there are times I don’t fully understand what they think either.
But honor is bigger than agreement.
Honor, for me, looks like:
Speaking with respect even when I disagree.
I don’t have to raise my voice, slam doors, or throw old wounds in their face. I can say, “I see it differently,” without tearing them down.
Listening instead of just waiting to talk.
My mom and stepdad have lived a lot of life. I don’t have to take every piece of advice, but I can at least listen like it matters—because they matter.
Showing up in the ways I can.
Maybe it’s helping with something around the house, running an errand with them, answering the phone when they call, or just sitting and spending time together. Being present is one way I say, “You’re important to me.”
Saying “thank you” for what they did get right.
No parent is perfect. Mine aren’t. I’m not either. But I can still recognize the sacrifices, the late nights, the worry, the support they’ve given me along the way and tell them I’m grateful.
Keeping boundaries without bitterness.
As an adult, I have to protect my mental health and my sobriety. That sometimes means setting limits, saying no, or doing things differently. But I can do that without shaming them or making them feel small. Boundaries don’t cancel honor.
There are days when it feels easier to pull away—to stay mad, stay distant, or live like I don’t need anybody. But I know I wouldn’t be where I am today without my mom and stepdad. Honoring them is my way of saying, “I see you. I appreciate you. I know you’re not perfect, and neither am I—but I’m thankful you’re in my life.”
I don’t always get it right. I still say things I wish I could take back. I still let my pride jump in the driver’s seat sometimes. But I keep coming back to this: I can disagree and still love. I can think differently and still show respect. I can be an adult and still honor the people who helped raise me.
That’s the kind of son I’m trying to be.
—Josh Bridges
YOU {R} NOT ALONE YOU HAVE A VOICE! 